Archive - Desire RSS Feed

Desiring Seconds Over Firsts

September 30, 2010 in Desire with 1 Comment

My wife and I are reading Larry Crabb’s book “Soul Talk” and came across this amazing quote by C.S. Lewis. Think about that last sentence for a while…

“To sacrifice the greater good for the less and then not to get the lesser good after all–that is the surprising folly. . . Every preference of a small good to a great, or a partial good to a total good, involves the loss of the small or partial good for which the sacrifice was made. Apparently the world is made that way. If Esau really got his pottage in return for his birthright, then Esau was a lucky exception. You can’t get second things by putting them first; you can get second things only by putting first things first.” – C.S. Lewis

Silencing the Noise

September 15, 2010 in Desire, Listening, Prayer, Reading with 0 Comments

One early morning this past week, I sat down to read some scripture and found myself bombarded with noise. It was self-induced and I desired it more than quietness.

The noise was comforting. It created a layer between what I was reading and my soul’s desire to listen.

What does comforting noise look like?

  • thoughts of what lay in store for today
  • worrying over customer projects
  • refilling that coffee mug
  • checking email while reading or while someone is speaking
  • looking up at the lights
  • reading a verse and immediately thinking of application or how it might make for a great article
  • anticipating the joy of checking something off
  • glancing at the clock
  • applying my own filter to what I’m reading
  • glancing at my calendar while wrapping up a chapter
  • coming immediately to God with needs
  • following a bunny trail of links
  • reading instead of praying
  • notification sounds of emails coming in
  • the blinking light on a BlackBerry
  • twittering or facebooking something you just read
  • seeking the companionship of an iPad rather than solitude
  • texting while at the red light
  • listening in one ear while someone is talking, while also browsing or typing

That kind of noise is comforting because it allows us to interact on our terms, without commitment, applying our own unconscious filter. It allows us to communicate without listening. It keeps us in the safe zone.  It fills our desire to be needed and productive.

We were not made for that, though.

Real communication is found in quietness, when we desire to silence the noise so we can truly hear what the other person is saying. It is a very difficult place to get to and our flesh will fight it. Once we begin to desire silence over noise, though, we’ll finally be on our way to being wherever we are.

Cleaning is Dirty Business

September 11, 2010 in Desire, Home, Listening with 0 Comments

I was brushing my teeth this morning when I noticed a lot of old toothpaste splatter on the mirror. “Man, that really needs to get cleaned up.  I need to mention this to the kids or Kathi,” I told myself in a glub sort-of-way.

As I made my way downstairs to the recliner, I suddenly had an amazing thought: I could clean the mirror. Better yet, I could clean the WHOLE bathroom. As proud as I am of that moment, the really sad thing is I had to ask someone where the cleaning supplies were. Shouldn’t I know that?

With bleach in one hand and a scrub brush in the other, I began to knock away at the grime and scum. At war within me, though, was my old sinful heart: don’t worry about that nasty junk in the corner, Kathi can get that. Oh, see that disgusting stuff under the toilet ring, don’t even touch that – nobody knows it is there anyway. Just a good once over is plenty, but for goodness sakes, be sure to really clean your side of the mirror. Don’t forget, the Seminoles are playing in a few minutes, you don’t want to miss that.

Yeah, that was a really great moment. However, recognizing what was really happening within my heart, the Holy Spirit broke through and I began to listen: as hard as it will be, how about trying to do a better job than Kathi would – not to one-up her, but to show her you really love her. See that grime underneath the faucet  handle – get that.  You know that rust stain in the corner of the shower you look at every morning, spend an extra 10 minutes and get rid of it. You know that toilet you sit on everyday, wipe that sucker down.

Yeah, there was a real battle going on, but the Holy Spirit won and I began to clean like mad man.  Rather than doing something half-baked, my desire switched to doing something based in love and a desire to serve. I desired to give excellence and that was nothing but God at work.

Cultivating a servant’s heart begins with looking in the mirror and recognizing the dirtiness for what it really is: sin. Thankfully, it is pure grace that we have the Holy Spirit to it point it out to us and begin the cleaning process. We just need to listen.

To Foster the Growth of

August 23, 2010 in Desire, Home, Listening, Prayer, Reading, Technology with 0 Comments

Merriam-Webster defines cultivate as:

1) to prepare or prepare and use for the raising of crops; also : to loosen or break up the soil about (growing plants)
2) a : to foster the growth of; b: to improve by labor, care, or study : refine
courtesy of RedWelly: http://www.flickr.com/photos/redwelly/89928491/
I especially like 2a: to foster the growth of. It implies that there is something that needs growing, something that is worth growing, and it requires some help in order to grow. In light of that definition, here are some questions I want to wrestle with over the coming months and years:
  1. What does it mean to foster the growth of our desires? How does that look and who’s the beneficiary? What’s the motivation?
  2. How do we nurture the culture and temperature of our home; and why would we want to?
  3. Does our use of technology or gadgets negatively impact our interaction with people? How do we cultivate our use of technology?
  4. What is quietness and how do we cultivate it to impact how we listen to people with our eyes, ears and heart?
  5. Why is it uncomfortable to be alone while reading or praying, and how do we cultivate that time so that we learn to listen while reading and praying?

photo courtesy of RedWelly

Page 2 of 2«12